I’m Gonna Miss You, Buddy

Dear John,

Ang daya mo naman eh, sabi mo you want us to meet each other one day.. I guess, it’s never going to happen now 🙁 Mr. Death has already visited you 🙁 Remember when I told you na sana those evil people nalng ang nagkaganyan na condition, but you scolded me that I shouldn’t be thinking that way.

Maybe you’re now wondering how did Joan know about it, since I’m just your online buddy. Na kung saan ikaw lang nakakaalam ng access para mamessage ako. Your sister told me about it. She said she was glad that she can access your email, then I remember – Yeah, I think we have a few exchange messages via email. When I went home, I opened my email. I saw your sister’s message saying you passed away.

Shocked, then my tears began to filled my eyes. Tired from work and no more tears to cry.. I.. by then..  fell asleep.

Morning.. I continued mourning.. still, can’t believe that you’re gone.”Joan would be worried if I wasn’t online” – Your sister told me this. And this was during your hospital days. I can’t help but smile that you mentioned me to your sister. I was touched he was thinking about me in his most fragile state. You always made sure that I’m not gonna get worried whenever you were being sent back to the hospital. You made me laugh even if I know you’re in pain 🙁

I messaged your sister back and got her response; “He really wasn’t well these last 18 months but I still hoped he would get better. But you’re right he is at peace now free from his discomfort.”

You’re really good at hiding it from me, John. Props to you because you even managed to made jokes about it. You were really happy to tell me that you already have an AC 😀

The thought that you didn’t make it on your birthday makes me quite sad. It’s your birthday on February 1st. You would have been 38. Happy Birthday, bud! 🙁 Hugs** Thank you for being such a good friend and a wonderful person. This is really sad and I’m crying while typing this.

I’m going to miss those weird, interesting and informative articles you’re always sending me from time to time. All of those were amazing. Robots and other geeky out of this world, interesting stuff.

I’m gonna miss you so much, buddy 🙁

Really brave, John. Rest in Peace <3

tumblr_oega6xqjpl1qg9pglo2_r1_540tumblr_oega6xqjpl1qg9pglo1_r1_540

Advertisements

In Love Again (Naturally)

Japan Tokyo Tower Discovery

The distance is discouraging.
Yet still, I am attached.
I’m scared to mess things up again.
I’m scared you’ll say good-bye.
I felt the sparks fly whenever we have our chitchat.
And when we watch a film together, I was like a happy cat.
I felt the sparks fly whenever you prepare your dinner.
Because food makes my heart beat faster than ever.
The scariest and the greatest feeling ever.
Infinitesimally small chances that we’re gonna be together.
That you are mine in this futile life made of matter.
That only made by accident, too- isn’t that sweeter? 
In love again and so freaking afraid this will also end like the previous one.
In love again to the man that you adore for a short period of time.
In love again, and yes this time hoping we’ll never say goodbye.
Fuck it, I’m in love! Let’s make this a passionate one. 
– Joan of Art –

The Girl Who Waited: The Second Man

She got jealous to another girl you’re getting your eyes on.. She cried in the shower… while listening to her new downloaded song of Carole King!! It was a sad song entitled “Will you still love me tomorrow?” Every lyrics brought her into tears as they were meant to hit every sad emotions she had felt that day. It was a sad and gloomy bath. “Why you didn’t pay attention to me?”, the girl whimpered. Life must go on.. she said. Strongly convincing herself to move on, find someone that will appreciate you.

So, there’s the second man. You need to start somewhere, a common ground… Bill Hicks is the name. The name that described what kind of individual this second man she met. A witty, British git, If you’d like to call him that. A smooth talker, haha she always said that to him, whenever he complimented her. In her mind, ooh this guy knows woman likes compliments, likes to feel special… this guy knows. ‘No, you’re gorgeous! Believe me.’, he insisted. She was lonely, a woman who needs a company, and he was there. Cheering her up. He’s really good at it. He really got her. “Click!” They’re on. It was sweet. She feels special. Right there and then, he wanted to be with her. She already fell with this second man. Argh! No escape.

Lo and behold.. she learned he has a partner. You don’t want to see this girl getting jealous, believe me. She cried. He explained she “was” his partner. “Oh Gawd! I don’t want to be a mistress”, her mind shouted. She found out, in his culture, people don’t usually get married if they don’t want to, and stay as partner for long as they wish. Which is good. It’ll give people more options and freedom. Marriage is just for legal purposes. That being said, marriage cant be used in judging relationships. Be married or not, what matters most is what they have is real, the love is real. Continue reading “The Girl Who Waited: The Second Man”